The Asparagus Experience

Everyone needs a laugh for the day. You do. It's required for stress free living. For living the good life. Well I think I can supply that for you today.
It all started with a lovely Mother's Day. I stopped by to see my Mom and it's always filled with  lots of visiting, giggling and eye rolling. (I have 2 teenagers you know. I have to roll my eyes some.)

I'm not the goofy mom on the right. It just isn't right! Oh ok... there's a better picture:

I don't know what happened. It shrunk. It's crazy. It's unmentionable so anyway,
Later in the day, my in-laws and some dear friends came out for supper. We grilled some steaks and ate like pigs. :)  As all good farmer's wives do, my MIL and I walked around the yard looking at flower beds and soon made it to the garden. I've passed the inspection so far. haha.
Earlier this spring, Country Boy and I decided we wanted to start an asparagus bed. It's important. Green Veggies are the substance of life. I found some asparagus and I thought it was going to be great. I read the package carefully, after all I've been gardening now for almost 20 years. I know how to read the directions by now. So I planted the darn things 3 weeks ago and they still looked like this:

Yeah, the package said I would soon have green shoots coming up and to continue to put more dirt around the shoots as they got bigger. ..   ok....

As you can see the only thing getting green are the weeds in the background. Great.
Well, As the garden tour continues I bring my MIL over to the asparagus bed and ask her what she thinks the problem could be. **Dead Silence**  oh no.  Then, as she is trying not to laugh, she tells me she thinks I have a problem. The asparagus just doesn't look right. Yeah, I know. What in the world could it be I ask her. Well, she says, for starters I should put the roots in the ground. Put the roots in the ground. Put the roots in the ground.

The laughing was extremely loud at this point. I had to take my glasses off I was laughing so hard. No wonder I didn't have any green asparagus shoots. The root is required to be in the ground before it will start to grow. Mine were flapping in the wind like little flags. oh boy.

Kathy is laughing while covering the roots.

Well, we laughed and laughed and laughed. And covered the roots.

Buying new asparagus plants may be in my future. Maybe not. I'm waiting for green shoots again. We'll see what happens. I still have the instructions somewhere. I saved them. I just now decided I'm not going to find them. I like to think I read them right the first time.
Turns out C.B. didn't think the asparagus looked right either. He just didn't want to say anything. Hhhmmm....
Turns out our friend Alan didn't think they looked right either. How many people saw our asparagus roots flapping in the wind?? What else around here doesn't look right that no one has mentioned to me yet?
Well, I don't know. The bird war is still going on though. After the asparagus experience the bird war may be looking a little brighter.