Mr. Owl

The weather has been really nice the past few days. The flowers are all planted, the garden is planted and the birds have really been going crazy. One bird in particular.

Barn Swallow

This bird is obsessed and possessed with building a nest on my front porch.

See the light fixture up by the window? That's the objective here. That bird wants to have it and I don't want him to. Did you know that a barn swallow can eat up to 1,000 bugs and mosquitoes a day? Yeah, I didn't care either.

Mr. Owl

We have a ton of owls in our creek and we can hear them hooting just about every night. C.B.'s grandfather grew up on a place called 'Hoot Owl Holler' and so we thought that would be fitting for our place too. Well, I bought Mr. Owl a couple years ago and a purple plastic snake from Dollar store to help me in my war against the barn swallow. Apparently you aren't suppose to shoot swallows. That was my first choice of action. My purple snake didn't help either. I guess birds aren't color blind.

I tried hanging a dish towel around the light once. That didn't do it. The darn bird just pooped on it.

Just look at that mud on there. The bird..  he's just a brat.... he just keeps trying to build his mud nest. It's not going to work. I have Mr. Owl now. He's sitting right on the porch for all the birds to see.
Whenever I go out the front door the bird is there watching me. If I venture out too far he starts chirping at me. I just know he's cussing me out. Cause that's what I want to do to him every time I walk out the door. I do not want bird droppings by my front door. I do not Mr. Bird. When I go to water my flowers by the front porch the bird swoops above my head and dive bombs me, chirping like a mad fool. Since shooting cannot be an option, I thought about getting a tennis racket. A softball bat just won't cut it. I need more square footage.

He's not very big but he's a big problem for me. When you drive by my house and see someone running down the sidewalk with their arms flailing wildly above their head, they are not crazy. The bird made them do it. I'm planning my next offensive. Mr. Owl is helping but he's just not taking care of it. Maybe I can put petroleum jelly all around my light fixture... haha. Maybe I can try moth balls, what about bird spray.....
I need another cup of coffee. Who knew your arms could get so tired just walking out to the driveway..........